This breakup to you is like an explosion of freedom.You amaze me. You have hurt me just as much but somewhat I’m made to feel that I’ve let you down and I owe you an apology and a redemption. Ironically I am the one who spiraled, not you. You walked away carefree with no regards whatsoever.
Good experiences come when you keep an open mind.
I will never be able to understand your definition of clarity when you surround yourself with friends and more new friends. Were you in solitude for even a day for reflection and in your words, healing? At this juncture, I was in solitude for 35 days.
In this period of lost, I’d experienced dsyphoria, dysfunction, vertigo and comatose. I threaded between sanity and insanity and I had to go for therapy sessions to keep in equilibrium. My therapist even recommended myself being warded in IMH for a few days. I’ve taken all kinds of medication and forced into sedation. I’m permanently scarred, physically, mentally and emotionally.
With each passing day, your nonchalance pushed me further and further away. Try again you said. How, when our correspondence can only be restricted to a 4X6cm screen. Minimal.
You asked me to write but the days where you couldn’t wait to reply my mails were over, long over. I could feel it. I could feel how distant you are. Nothing in the world matters on your freedom, desires and what not, clarity.
Clarity. What is clarity that you have to breakaway to see.